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YouDay: The roller coaster after my father passed away

Coach LaMonte digs into the cycle he experienced after a very personal death.

CHARLOTTE, N.C. — My father passed away in 2017.

I remember when I received the news, I was overcome with a lot of emotions. Anger, resentment, sadness, and regret were what surfaced, and it seemed like they did so one by one.

It was like a rollercoaster ride, mainly because I harbored unforgiveness in my heart toward him. I remember being confused, not knowing how to mourn. Do I mourn the man who was? Or do I mourn the man I always hoped he could become? It was like the little boy inside me kept calling out for the man I always longed to see.

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The question that haunted me for years: why didn't he offer more of his life to me? That's what helped fuel that refusal to forgive. But I prayed and reflected, and found the strength to forgive him in my heart.

Here's what I found: many people can't offer much of themselves because they may never develop the sense of understanding their own actions. In everything that we do, we will have people in our lives that we develop certain emotions towards. In the end, forgiving them of their wrongs is the best gift we can give to ourselves.

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